18 May It’s Up To YOU & Taking Time Out.
It’s bee a pretty ‘rah’ day here today… I thought it was just me, but I checked and some others are feeling it too… So, perhaps I am not alone!
I woke up yesterday morning feeling like shit. It’s been a very interesting past 10 days, finishing the workshops and integrating Integration! I have gone through huge growth in the past year, but the past 10 day’s have been HUGE. When I woke yesterday, I didn’t want to get out of bed, I didn’t want to be social or do ANYTHING. I pulled a card from the app on my phone – cause seriously, what is going on?!? Stay Positive. And then another card from another deck, saying something similar. Okay, got it. Yes. My negative thought patterns were in a huge spiral. So. I lay there for longer. And really worked consciously with what is/was going on. I also realised I was awaiting the garbage truck to come and take some stuff that was significant away. And energetically was another big shift when I heard it come by.
I realised when I pulled those cards, that I have a conscious choice. To stay with my negative spiral (that has never got me any place helpful in the past!), or I could do what my Soul needed to do and that was get out of the house, into the Sunshine and Nature and be with myself. I used to ‘pfft’ at those cards in the past when they would come up – Stay Positive – it used to piss me off more! Yet, I have learnt, since getting pneumonia at Christmas time last year, that it is up to me to change my thoughts, nothing will shift until I change my perspective. It isn’t about denying the shitty feelings and thoughts that I have and am experiencing, yet it is realising that I am consciously choosing to think like this and: How can I change my thinking? How can I support myself right now? And doing something about it.
I realised I really needed ‘in’ time. I needed ‘me’ time. I needed space. And I needed quiet time. Yet, I still wanted Ocean. Yet, I still wanted Nature. I took myself down to my healing local beach, where on a school/work day, no one is about. It is isolated in seemingly ‘suburbia’ and it was just what I needed. I surfed, I swam with Adaya, I chilled with company that I needed. And it was exactly what made me feel better. I felt much better by allowing myself to do what I felt like doing, than what I should be doing.
Taking a Break from Social Media
Whilst yes, this is my month off and is what I need, the past 10 days have been an adjustment to 1 – not doing anything and 2 – it feels like I am adjusting to not working so much, or something. Like when you go away on holiday, and need that space to recover/adjust back after your holiday? That feels like what I have been in. And things only started to feel ‘normal’ again, after the beach yesterday morning.
This next 4 day’s I am going inward. In a big way. Whilst yes, my month off is supporting me, I need some cocoon time away from Social Media to allow myself to really slow down and feel into what needs to be done, what my next steps are.
I’ll be back on deck on Monday 23rd of May. Yes, it is only a couple of days, but geez, my SOUL is craving it!
Love. Love all you do. Love all you feel. Choose Love. xxx